How the system works.

I am about to let you in on a little secret that is so huge it will blow your mind. Care to see ho far down the rabbit whole will take you? follow me... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------->


Okay, now that were safe. The system ,is fake. Its made up of numbers, that the Government created.
Numbers have been around for years, farther back than letters, we first started talking with numbers. (Believe it or not). WE all have a number that identifies us, without that number, you don't exist. O_o.
Bizarre right? You need a number to get to your bank account, a number to know which house is yours. A number for what county you live in. Numbers are everywhere, they make up our world.
What if we truly live in the matrix? and everything is all made up of small numbers, after all, everything is all math. Ever molecule, everything you see, its all math...

Even when you want to order food from a restaurant. "I'll have a number five please..." Either this world is fake, and its a number world. Or the man must really like numbers, that's all I've got to say.

My Experience with Alien Abduction

Our followers may have noticed that neither of us have written for a while...the truth is that I got abducted by aliens on my 21st birthday. (I'm not sure what Jake's excuse is.) My birthday started off with eating pancakes for breakfast and having coffee with my mom then she revealed to me that every person in our family is abducted by aliens on their 21st birthday for a couple of weeks so we "cannot be corrupted by this cruel and sinful world" Most people go out and get drunk on their 21st birthday, I got abducted by aliens. Way cooler. Well, I thought it would have been except for they didn't take me to another planet...just another country. And it was lame. They didn't even speak English...they just locked me in a cold, dark room until the 2 weeks are up. So my advice to everyone, don't get abducted by aliens. I would have rather just stayed home. I wouldn't have gotten drunk anyways.

Area 51 exists, its so secret everyone knows about it.

Area 51, is a touchy subject, everyone thinks they have aliens hidden in a secret military base that no one knows bout it. That's how secret it is. We have pictures to prove Aliens exist, we have old footage of seeing Aliens come and go, people claiming to have seen them, and taking lie detector test's, failing, but still claiming their story to be true. What if the Aliens knew we would make them take a test so they put something in his/her blood that would always fail the test? ever think of that? I didn't think so...

It would clearly make sense, seeing how they are far more advanced than us, with lasers and flying machines, able to go in space, we don't even go out there anymore...
The infamous corn rings you say? well Alien ships leave those behind here on earth every now and again, they  are perfectly normal.
The Aliens planet is so far out there, we didn't know they exist, though they have found us. When they are flying close to earth, and when the mamma Alien is pregnant, they have to put it a corn field so it can live off the corn til it can fly away by its self. Hence, the space ship sized circle.
The reason the corn is gone, and not only mushed. Is because they are all All Gore followers and have decided to teach their youngen's to create gas from corn., and it last's for ever cause Aliens are smart like that...

So when you see a star flying over head, and it suddenly vanishes, think of Marvin, cause he is out there--somewhere, living like a true martian. .

The King of rock n roll is alive

When I fist found out, it shocked my quite a bit, I'm not going to lie, my socks flew off. It was cray. I am only telling you this, because I care about you. If you wish not to believe it, that is your choice, but you will not be safe after I give you this fare warning. Ye be warned...

The King is alive, and well. living underground only coming into the light to perform as his nationwide phenomenon. A Canadian pop-sensation who goes by the name of the young 'star' "Justin Bieber".
Yes, right now you are sitting in your chair, or walking with you cool Iphone, or laying outside by a beach somewhere saying out loud, "whaaaaat?" thinking I have lost all my credibility, but hear me out. Elvis, is timeless, I mean. Come on! he is the king! and long may the King rain.
The supposedly young artist, has some dance moves he likes to pull off while performing, well. As we all know, so did sir Elvis Presley, he had those awesome leg moves. Well, that was the 50's and 60's, times have changed, and you either change with the times or get left behind, and Elvis, had to "die" to get some dance lessons from all the greats, like. Patrick Swazey from Dirty Dancing, he just had to wait for someone to teach him. Though now he is back in the game, but of course he cannot all of the sudden show up again, his career would fall apart, he would not be loved anymore. So he created a fake alias. "Justin Bieber" born march 1 1994... His songs may have changed from when he first started out, but so have the times. He knows what he is doing, don't question the King.

Mounties are Conspiring...

Canada's lovable Mounties, also known as the "Royal Canadian Mounted Police" who say that they're responsible for "enforcing federal laws in Canada" have a secret that they're not telling Canadians. Their real goal is to take over the world in order to acquire every single chocolate bunny in the entire country. Haven't you Canadians noticed your dear beloved Mounties gaining a little bit of weight lately? (about 22.680 kilograms each, actually.) They are slowly but surely stealing all of the chocolate bunnies starting with Quebec and working their way around to Manitoba, sneaking into Ontario. So be careful dear Canadians. Hide your kids'(and spouses) chocolate bunny in a safe place because they're stealing every bunny out there.

Introduction and About the Authors

Hello everyone! We had this idea to collaborate on a blog of ridiculous, made up stories because we know that people make money off of writing them. We don't actually care about the money, we just think that it would be funny to see what we can come up with. None of these blogs with the exception of this one are true.Don't even expect them to be good, but expect to laugh your head off. If you're interested in following our personal blogs. We both like to write creatively and about different life lessons that God teaches us.:

 My head is where I come up with these things (Jake)

Wherever He leads, I'll go (Emily)

Or follow us on Twitter: Emily  

Jake

ABOUT THE AUTHORS

About Emily Moews: I'm a 20 (I will be 21 on July 24th but as of right now, I'm 20) year old Social Work student at North Central University in Minneapolis, MN. I am a Christian and God is very important to me. I have been told that I'm really good at looking beneath the surface to find what is beautiful in the mundane.

Hobbies: Writing, Poetry, Making Stuff, Music, Laughing, Encouraging

Favorite Band: Thrice, The City Harmonic

Favorite Movie:  Nacho Libre, Losing Isaiah

Favorite Color: Pink, Black,Green

Favorite Thought-Provoking Quote: "All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen."- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Favorite Funny Quote:  "Beneath the clothes, we find a man... and beneath the man, we find his... nucleus."-Nacho Libre

About Jake Carroll: I am 18, I play guitar and write music, my music is who I am, I can say this with all honesty cause I put all of my heart into it. I am a Son of God- He is all I live for.  

Hobbies: Guitar, Piano, Riding horses, Poetry, I enjoy a nice walk on the beach ;) 

Favorite Band: Ohhhh, thats tough.. I don't think I could single out one band

Favorite Movie: Can't do that either, to many great ones out there...but if I had to pick? Tangled.

Favorite Color: Green, Purple, Blue. 

Favorite Thought-Provoking Quote: I have had so many hit home with me, the one that sticks out the most in my head right now, would have to be one I heard recently "Though this may be where I breath never let it be where I call home"-- Jon Foreman

Favorite Funny Quote: